We are a sub culture and alternative humour website, trying to better understand life through whimsical japery and rapier wit. We discuss news, media, and weird stuff; all key parts of the essential mental diet. Visit our sister sites in the above links for more from us but on such spheres as music, football and the Daily Sport. Feel free to ask us anything. We don't bite......hard..... We don't re-blog. All work here is our own......bitches.

DAILY MAIL/NEWS: At long last, everyone’s least favourite Coren (Giles) gives his thoughts on the sexism scandal at Sky (27/01/2011).

Does anyone here want to become famous, yet have no talent or brain? So you can’t sing, dance, act, write or do anything useful, yet want to become a household name? My suggestion; write for the Daily Mail. In the last week we have seen Liz Jones - who is usually confined to slagging off foreign staff in H & M - become a ratings smash with her hopelessly misjudged piece on Jo Yeates, and then witnessed Melanie Phillips - who can normally be found on a soap-box in speakers corner harping on about ‘evil Palestinians’ - put Daily Mail’s advertising revenue sky-high following her piece about gay penguins brainwashing children (or something. I’ve tried to erase all memory of that article from my mind). Now, Giles “You know, you love my dad Alan and sister Victoria. I just sort of appeared for no reason. A bit like the bass player in Hanson” Coren wants a bit of the action.

He’s written an article (i use the term written VERY loosely) about ‘sexism-gate’ at Sky TV, and how that when it comes to sexism; Women are far worse than men;

But while Gray has now been sacked, I don’t expect that will be the end of the matter. 

We will hear an endless shrieking to ‘kick sexism out of football’; a PE teacher will be fired for telling his goalkeeper to ‘stop crying like a girl’; and a hapless League One manager will be deported for describing a fight between players as ‘handbags at dawn’.

There will be the endless apologies, public soul-searching and self-flagellation. And as usual the rest of us men will be expected to atone as a sex for a couple of remarks by two fat, superannuated fools on the telly, and to grovel for forgiveness with every snivel and cringe of our waking lives.

Not that that’s anything new. To be a man in this country is constantly to have to apologise for oneself and to be ever so very careful about every sentence we speak or write which contains any reference at all to members of the opposite sex.

Yeah men get is so rough in this country, where the fuck is our suffragette movement? Where’s Emmett Pankhurst? As Brits, we love to moan. Whether or not it’s middle class people moaning about people on benefits despite the fact they have more money than sense, or bankers moaning about high taxes despite the fact that we have high taxes to pay for their fucking mess; we just LOVE to moan. And Giles has decided that women get it way too easy, and they need a taste of just how tough it is to be a man.

While sexism from men is the outstanding social crime of the modern world, women can say absolutely whatever they like about us.

For make no mistake: sexism is alive and well in this country and applauded in all quarters — as long as it is practised by women. And they are allowed to say the most terrible, terrible things.

Only last week, for example, Jo Brand, the newly crowned Best Female TV Comic at the British Comedy Awards, was on Have I Got News For You and replied to the question ‘What’s your favourite kind of man, Jo?’ by saying: ‘A dead one.’ Oh, how the audience fell about. And the other contestants, all male, chortled away too.

It’s not just Brand, it’s all women. ‘What do you call the useless flap of skin attached to a penis?’ they joke. ‘A man!’ they all reply, and clink their chardonnay glasses and chortle till dawn. How on earth did this get to be OK?

It’s just mad isn’t it? The way Jo Brand cavorts around saying men are useless in comedy gigs, but we can’t say sexually derogative comments about women in a professional environment. What has this world come to? I long for the days when I could sexually harass ‘da birdz’ at work and not worry about the PC police turning up and telling me what i can and can’t do. Oh those days…

The great lie. All men want is sex. Not so. If anything, it is women who think only of having it off. Girls on average lose their ­virginity much younger than boys and have more sexual partners in youth. 

As a teenager, I was ­terribly shy about sex and yet girls were trying to do it with me all the time. I used to run, literally run, from their bedrooms when they tried it on. And yet women are allowed endlessly to harangue us with our supposed lechery.

Right, so all women are sluts and Giles Coren is a sex god. Have I entered some sort of other dimension here? Am I really reading this utterly self- absorbed, narcissistic tripe.

Women are far meaner, more brutal, aggressive, small-minded, jealous, petty and venal than any man. 

If women ruled the world ­countries would be invaded because ‘she’s always been jealous of my feet’ and because ‘she looks down on me for going out to work’. 

Millions would die, torture would increase. If women ruled the world there would be carnage.

Seriously, Giles; You’re a pathetic wind-up merchant. Just fuck off. If I were him, I ‘d be praising any religion going that his Dad was Alan Coren, who’s contacts he could use to carve himself out a career as a no-mark media personality, because otherwise that man would be selling fast-foot from a motorway caravan.

This whole saga has been used as an excuse for people to claim ‘well it’s one rule for women, one rule for men’. No. It’s. Not. You want to know the difference between Jo Brand, Loose Women and Gray/Keys’ statements? Loose women and Jo Brand are comedy vehicles looking for laughs. There’s nothing personal about it, it’s mainly comprised of ‘men are a bit shit aren’t they, the way they get drunk and don’t do enough round the house’ *CLAP CLAP CLAP*. What Keys and Gray said was that a woman would be unsuitable for her job because of her gender. If you cannot see the difference between the two examples, then, well, I give up.

(Giles seen below in his preferred era of the 19th Century)


NEWS: Andy Gray sees Red for sexist comments. Was he right to be sacked? (26.01)

(I was going to go with ‘Gray shown Red after offside comments about lineswoman are flagged. Was it a poor decision?’ So be happy you escaped with just one referee pun)

25-year-old Sian Massey, a lineswoman in the Wolverhampton vs Liverpool match at the weekend, was the main talking point following the game. Was it because of her fantastic call to give Merieles on-side for Liverpool’s first goal, a decision that a number of her male counterparts wouldn’t have had the confidence to make? No, it’s because pundits Andy Gray and Richard Keys didn’t think she’d know the rules. You know, because she’s a lady.

Gray and Keys were overheard making deriding comments about Massey on an undetected microphone;

They concurred that female officials “don’t know the offside rule”, with Keys adding: “I can guarantee you there’ll be a big one today. (Liverpool manager) Kenny (Dalglish) will go potty.”

Massey crucially made a correct borderline call in the build-up to Liverpool’s first goal at Molineux.

Keys also went on to remark on comments made by Brady in The Sun on Saturday morning about the level of sexism in football by saying: “See charming Karren Brady this morning complaining about sexism? Yeah. Do me a favour, love.”

More footage from a separate incident involving Gray was later released:

Burton initially described 25-year-old Miss Massey as “a bit of a looker”, referring to comments by another colleague.

The reporter continued: “He (a Sky Sports crew member) says she (Massey) is all right. Now, I don’t know if I should trust his judgement on that?”

Gray replied: “No, I wouldn’t. I definitely wouldn’t… I can see her from here.”

He then swore and added: “What do women know about the offside rule?”

The final nail in Gray’s coffin was a video from the production of a sky sports Christmas special. It shows Gray making harassing comments with a sexual undertone towards co-anchor Charlotte Jackson.

Although he was only initially suspended, Sky came to decision that with the mounting evidence his position had become untenable, and he was formally sacked.

The response has been varied; some claiming that he should be sacked for his discriminating comments, while others believe that it was just a bit of friendly banter.

The fact is that in corporations the size of Sky, you have to have a zero tolerance policy towards discrimination in any form. ITV and Sky took a zero tolerance approach to racism after comments made by Ron Atkinson and Rodney Marsh, and sacked them on the spot. To take one approach to racism and another to sexism, just says to women out there ‘yeah, we just don’t think you’re THAT important’. Women’s football is the fastest growing sport in Britain, and Sky Sports have countless female staff employed in their production and broadcasting departments. It’s an equal playing field now, and you can’t employee people with archaic views.

What Andy Gray said was not light-hearted banter. By claiming she wouldn’t know the offside rule because she female, Gray openly stated that Massey was incompetent at her job because of her sex. There is nothing humorous about that. It’s pure sexism. If you’re going to implement a systematic, zero-tolerance approach to discrimination, then it has to be just that. Gray was right to go, and hopefully this can be a wakeup call for fans and pundits alike, that the game has changed.